To become separate of our primitive drives is impossible. While it may appear strange, every dog, no matter how well trained they are, will howl if you howl also. There is no amount of knowledge that will suppress our nature as animals.
Sympathy for those that suffer is a passive act. Empathy, too, is simply more personable. It is better to help people you do not feel for than to feel deeply for those you do not help.
The Hagakure (Shambhala 2014) teaches a technique to stop yawning: pushing upward on your forehead and/or licking your lips. The book has other deeper insights and inspires both these posts and my philosophy.
As a parallel opposite to a prior post, if you believe something can never happen for you, the opportunities dry up and become truly impossible. "Manifestation" is fantasy, but intention can manifest our reality. To seek what you want, open your eyes and search.
To believe something is 100% certain and also likely not to come true is not madness... by believing the former, the chances for success can grow beyond expectations. Do not fear personal absolutes that closes the gap to victory.
There are easily recognizable metrics for worth, but to live with the capacity to experience joy is priceless. When the days seem long and absent of meaning, find time for personal joy.
Common tactics amongst therapists is allowing the client to realize their conflicts via questioning, while also being inquisitive about their past relationships. We all fall into patterns, and to break out of them, we must both know and feel them to be true.
Those that suffer will often deflect or obfuscate to avoid sharing their pain with others... this amplifies suffering via isolation. When your help is rejected, become available and kind-hearted. You cannot force recovery.
Addictions are like weeds: they survive in spite of us knowing their existence, and (once introduced somewhere) can be difficult to get rid of. They provide amazing feelings which lead to ruin. At every point in life, beware the weeds.
The present moment is the most valuable place to keep focus on. At any moment, the future you predict can change or end abruptly, and the past you remember will slip out of your memory. The real and the now are one in the same.
There is a critical transition between obfuscating the truth and telling a lie... when asked directly for the truth, do not hesitate to do so. Be wary of consequences, but don't linger on the negatives and make preparations beforehand to soften the impact.
Learning about someone can be compared to tending a fire... allow the fire to burn on its own and strategically provide "wood" to nurture the conversation. Likewise, if there is no wood to your fire, do not be afraid to become ash.
A compliment is a gift best recieved with humility. Do not feel embarrased or prideful when recieving praise, and instead see these moments as confirmation that the path you travel bears fruits for others as well.
To disarm an opponent attempting to thwart you with words, ask questions and point out their dispositions when they present themselves. When you are calm and straightforward, opponents will often defeat themselves through their anger and deflection.
While the spirit to become a master lies within many, the capability and constant drive to improve exists in only a few. To attract the optimal outcome, ignore notoriety and focus solely on betterment even if training is uncomfortable, repetitive and boring. Without training, mastery is a delusion.
Strengthen your resolve by running madly into challenges and making no excuses to delay when the time to act arrives. A moment's hesitation displays weakness... simply make your plans on approach to each conflict and engage.
Setting within your heart that others will disappoint you and things will not always go your way will save you from major frustrations; in contrast, the rare instances where both are false shall stand out and provide intense joy.
How others act can be frustrating when there is no possibility to appropriately call out or correct the behavior... not everyone is on your path and upholds your ideals. If the system doesn't correct them, assess their weaknesses and affirm that their mistakes will multiply without their own correction.
In the futile hope to be remembered eternally, weak men leave scars upon the Earth manifested by both grand monuments and mass graves. Do not fall for this existential lie... in time, they too will be buried and built over.
Dreams are windows into what we try to consciously hide. Interpretation might feel foolish for some, but our deepest fears, traumas and desires awaken when our mind cannot fight to repress them... to ignore this is far more foolish.
A silent walk absent of distractions can inspire contemplation. Walking also helps us digest food and is possibly the healthiest method to travel by. In times of turmoil, consider taking this potent step towards clarity and analysis.
If your support comes solely from foundation outside yourself, the ground will eventually disappear beneath you. If you cannot find inner strength and rely on yourself, isolation will give you a taste of this imminent freefall.
It is not uncommon to willingly act upon yourself with the knowledge that harm is certain. Alcohol, processed sugar and fat are (for many) common to consume. While moderation is recommended, knowledge on the depths of your harms will deter consistency in these acts.
What we believe, how we act and the words we say can all exist in separate places, but in the end, all three present others with your image. By being true to yourself and choosing carefully how to reveal these three facets, a tarnished picture becomes rare.
Irrationality is normal in human beings. To be completely logical and rational separates yourself from life, because life itself still exists with mystery and unsolved answers. Irrationality gives our ideas beauty and perspective.
There is a duality where our most dangerous desires exist opposite of our temperment: an outwardly charitable person wanting to steal, a doctor wanting to do harm, etc. Meditate on this truth when understanding yourself.
When deciding to pursue a new idea, find a way to notify yourself in the near future of this pursuit... this can potentially keep you on the path, or give you permission to put your sentiments aside and truly decide outside the prior moment whether it was truly worthy.
One can digest harsh truths by ritualistically remembering and taking the time to experience the feeling completely... in time and with repetition, the feelings will fade and only the truth, in all its clarity, will remain.
True privacy only exists in solitude. Once a secret is heard, it is no longer yours. The temptation to trust others must be remedied by the reminder that others share secrets believing that these are safe with you. In all sincerity, speak secrets solely to yourself.
Conflict is a virus which thrives in misunderstandings, misplaced resentment and a desire for retribution. Accept that you and everyone you know will die, and the path towards revenge is set in stone... all that's left is healing and understanding through connection.
It is easy to admit we have no control over our reality and harder to admit we are responsible for ourselves... in other words, we are more likely to seek blame outside our own agency. It's better to try and fail than blame our failures on the efforts of others we never tried to stop.
This wisdom was passed unto me when I was young: You will learn faster when the knowledge resolves a problem you wish to answer. This is yet another piece of advice I give without taking it, since most learners find answers without struggle through technology.
Intelligent people are less likely to show their full hand, while fools will wear their intentions proudly. Don't be afraid to ask advice from a fool who won't put forth the effort to decieve you.
No matter how strongly we feel about our dispositions with the world and its people, silence and strategically revealing ones thoughts will save yourself face and prevent unwanted harm. This also works for desire, suffering and making major decisions.
The most valuable lesson for those wishing to spread their knowledge is that there are many who are either unwilling to or incapable of truly listening and understanding every word. Let your listeners reveal themselves, and the methods to connect will, in time, appear.
Recognizing our capacity to decieve others, approach others equally regardless of their disposition... a fool may carry himself with an air of intelligence, and a smart man may display himself in a foolish manner.
While we cannot prove the past, its wisdom can provide years of insight which we have never lived, especially when given two perspectives on one point in time outside our own. Life gains texture from two perspectives.
There is only sincerity in recognizing others perspectives outside of your own when you recognize your capacity to change. To listen to others opinions without intent to learn and improve is merely entertainment.
You are more likely to discover opportunities when your mind actively seeks them. Shutting the door on potential will make it seem like it's never there; omitting the light outside will only prove the darkness to yourself.
Sometimes, a selfish plan of action enters the mind which can inspire cruel and unpredictable outcomes for reasons centering indulgance and pride. By choosing inaction, you have thwarted the enemy within you without consequence and harm.
It can be easy to daydream of an alternative life separate of our own when discontent enters your heart... these fantasies without manifest will crystalize this discontent. Have a plan in motion or you will succumb to this coffin of delusion and stagnation.
When promised punishment, lament only prolongs the intended suffering. If you resolve quickly that punishment is inevitable even when it isn't certain, the worst outcome does not dwell for long and the best outcome will reward your resolve.
Spanish cultures celebrate the dead to prevent being forgotten, which is the second death we all eventually undergo. Through stories, pictures, literature and memories, a collective memory imitates the individual life. You cannot replicate a life already lost. Find peace in finality.
While bias can be obfuscated, it cannot be eliminated. What we favor is a reflection of who we are, which only ends when we are no longer alive. Instead of solely monitoring decisions where bias has merit, also understand their origins and weaknesses.
Consider every year of your life a year of understanding only you can give yourself. Nobody can truly know your totality, especially off the fragility of the stories we tell about ourselves. To best be understood, be willing to understand yourself as a complete stranger... who and what do you see?
The capacity to recognize patterns is only as useful as the capacity to act on their outcomes. To predict a future you are unwilling to prepare for is futile and only leads to disappointment. There is no use for a smart person who doesn't act based on their wisdom.
Change is an inevitability. Habit manifests anguish when challenged or obstructed. Becoming adaptable and open to change is becoming awake to the reality of our world and the chaos outside our authority.
Sadness and happiness are both healthy and normal emotions. Crying and laughing can be therapeutic, and have a stronger effect in combination. Don't fear what comes naturally.
There is a nearly endless beauty in discovering reality's fundamentals. To seek higher knowledge without understanding its foundations can leave us open to deception. In clarity and simple truth, we fall in love with the journey.
Once you eliminate authority as merit for truth, the path to independence becomes more clear. The majority of us as children are raised by masters with the expectation we will eventually become our own. Society is not structured this way.